I enjoy seeing my friends through all of life's stages. I've seen them through dating, marriage, and now families. I love watching their kids play together and seeing them transform into wonderful parents. I have always looked up to them. I love being with them through all of life's ups and downs. Being a part of peoples live and them a part of yours is what life is all about. You can't take things with you but the relationships you have had along the way stay in your heart forever. True friendship is a gift that never gets tossed to the back of your closet or discarded in a move.
The knowledge that this move will change relationships is the tough. I don't know where I will be living or who I will be living with. There are no details about what it will be like once I step off the plane July 18. None of that bothers me or makes me nervous. The hardest part about leaving is saying good-bye. My coping mechanism is knowing I will be back to visit over the Holiday's. So this is not good-by just see you in January. I am saying good-bye to more than people. It is the close of this chapter and the beginning of another. As one person put it, I am starting over.
My feet aren't even on Peruvian soil yet and I am already being stretched in my relationship with God. In small group we have been reading "So Long Insecurity" by Beth Moore. It has really opened my eyes to a lot. I realize I wrap so much of my security in having great friendships and don't always fully rely on God like I should. I lean on people for so much. The first thing I do when I get in the car is call my mom on the phone and if she doesn't answer I try until I find someone else to talk to. I use people as a way to avoid being alone. There...I said it. I don't want to be alone. As a teenager I always struggled with fitting in and feeling like I didn't have real friendships. I made it my life's mission to never feel alone, unwanted, or like the outsider band geek I really was. Don't get me wrong God wants us to have meaningful encouraging friendships but he never means for us to put anything between us and him. I am learning to hand over so many areas of my life I thought made me secure. My security is in the LORD and HE is my strength!!
"10-12 And that about wraps it up. God is strong, and he wants you strong. So take everything the Master has set out for you, well-made weapons of the best materials. And put them to use so you will be able to stand up to everything the Devil throws your way. This is no afternoon athletic contest that we'll walk away from and forget about in a couple of hours. This is for keeps, a life-or-death fight to the finish against the Devil and all his angels. 13-18 Be prepared. You're up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it's all over but the shouting you'll still be on your feet. Truth, righteousness, peace, faith, and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them. You'll need them throughout your life. God's Word is an indispensable weapon. In the same way, prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Pray for your brothers and sisters. Keep your eyes open. Keep each other's spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out."
Ephesians 6:10-18 The Message
This is one of my favorite songwriters and singers from the band NeedToBreathe. This is such a fantastic song "Stones Under Rushing Water". The years truly go by so quickly and we waste it by not dancing before the Lord, our creator.
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